You Got The Money. We Got The Soul

Prior to recapping Saturday I need to add a couple of notes from last weekend's Roadhouse 66/Sox game.
Annie, asked by Rick if she prefers watching baseball or track & field (the two sports generally gracing our television), "Track & Field. I didn't even have to think about that."
And one more comment from the bachelorette 3 rows in front of us when ordering her hot dog, "I only want mustard because ketchup is stupid!" Perhaps the only moment when I didn't view her with disdain.

Now on to Saturday's bar crawl, featuring the return of Hall, game 7, game 2, popcorn on the floor and derby hats.
Firkin & Pheasant is a new joint on Diversey just west of Clark, next door to Matisse. It looked fairly impressive from the outside and we were looking forward to going there. This eager anticipation was replaced by unanimous letdown immediately upon entering. Carpet? Fancy booths? Big screen TVs not only playing Access Hollywood but also with the audio turned on...30 minutes before the climactic game in the greatest first round NBA playoff series ever? Did I mention the carpet? Overpriced food, unspectacular beer list, this joint is really more restaurant than watering hole.
Hall arrives and immediately makes the quote book, "This place is like a Ponderosa."
Tim arrives and also expresses his disappointment with the F&P, "This place reminds me of the Winchester from Shawn of the Dead...except for the carpeting, the booths, the lack of a pool table, no jukebox, and no rifle above the bar. Basically except for everything." Eventually they changed the audio to some generic music feed and we end with Third Eye Blind soundtracking our Fish & Chips. Tim orders the giant hotdog. It arrives:
"Oh Jesus Christ."
"That's the gayest food I've ever seen."
"Good Lord, this thing looks like a dick."

We decide Durkin's might be a good place to catch the basketball game. It wasn't a good place to catch the basketball game. Somehow Rick had never been to Durkin's before, which doesn't seem to make sense. A Kentucky Derby bar crawl had been going on earlier in the day and there's a handful of girls still around wearing their giant obnoxious hats. We move to the back room where it's less crowded and end up next to some loud guys at the bar who have probably been drunk since 1998. One of them has been cut off already. The back room TV's also aren't hi-def...whatever it is we're after isn't at Durkin's.

Leaving at halftime we head over to The Hidden Shamrock, the first good decision we made today. We're joined by a member of The Prairie Cartel, we drink some Bell's, and we watch the Bulls fail to knock off the Celtics in a somewhat anticlimactic game 7 that is redeemed by the fact that it is possibly Ben Gordon's last as a Bull. For some reason we discuss parenting skills...namely teaching any future sons to either be left-handed knuckleballers or field goal kickers. Everyone needs a retirement plan, right?

Next stop on the tour after watching the Blackhawks take revenge in game 2 of their second round series? The Burwood Tap. When we used to live at the 907 we had two great neighborhood bars in opposite directions on Wrightwood -- the Burwood Tap and the Wrightwood Tap. The Wrightwood Tap has since been remodeled and lost every ounce of character it once had -- hence we stopped visiting. Burwood, on the other hand, remains intact and has also improved significantly now that it no longer smells of cigarettes. Hall dumps a tray of popcorn on the floor and we are scolded by the back room bouncer protecting whatever super-important private party was going on. Annie joins us to make up for Tim's departure.

Another topic of discussion tonight...if you were independently wealthy would you use your money for evil? Would you use it to exploit your friends? (ala Mr. Burns in the episode where he makes Homer his monkey) If anyone was wondering, Hall definitely would. "I'll pay off your student loans if you xxxxCENSOREDxxxx."

Last stop (for EBONY at least), Tin Lizzy for a post-Wisconsin marathon celebration with some friends. I mostly just sat on the giant Red couch chair in the back waiting for us to head elsewhere. Rick and Hall left for Lincoln Square, which may or may not have been a good decision. I ended up at Baby Atlas and Big City Tap (already breaking my vow never to return there), and somehow I managed to lose one of my shirts before the night ended.

Everyone woke up alive on Sunday, so all is once again right in the world. After a weak April we're starting May off right. Not only is this my birthday month it's also American Craft Beer month at Binny's, which I appreciate and my checking account doesn't. We'll both be out of town next weekend (Mother's Day), but the following weekend will be Kyle's Birthday Bar Crawl on Saturday the 16th. List of destinations to be determined soon and probably posted here. Until then, stay thirsty my friends.