Living In Sin, Cause It Helps Me Pretend

There's a good chance this will turn into one of those weeks where I see more bands playing live music than there are official EBONY bar visits.
Through Friday morning we have 3 in the left column, zero in the right. That's not saying I haven't been to any bars this week, I just haven't been to any bars with Rick around. Taking our roles seriously as economic stimulators, Rick is in Mexico attempting to right some tourism wrongs after the H1N1 tore up their visitation numbers. Perhaps we'll get back on the Surly Bus once he returns this weekend.

Without bars to report on, we can at least get some housekeeping out of the way. The leaderboard hasn't been discussed since February, if I recall correctly.
So March featured 18 total bars and the entire podium was made up of former members of the 907. I've never been more proud (Lies. I've many times been more proud). The counts weren't too high, but totals for Jason and Jason were 5 each, and Tim/Peter/Leroy/Chuck takes first place with 7. T-shirts pending.

April was a slow month, as previously reported in the chronicle of these chronicles. Ten total bars, and only 2 people had more than one appearance. Half-hearted thanks to Hall for gracing us with his attendance at 2 bars (those were his epic performances of misery and annoyance at Mystic Celt and Metro before he finally went home). Larger thanks, once again, to Tim/Peter/Leroy/Chuck (one person) for showing up and sharing drinks with us at five bars. Two months in a row for the God of Skinny Little Punks.

Onto May...which will be wrapping up on Sunday. Thanks to the BBC we've got some surprise new blood near the top of the charts. With first place still undecided at this point, those over five through 5/28 are: Hall (5), Ream (5), Carolyn D (5), Ashley (6), KD (7), Abby (7), Tim/Peter/Leroy/Chuck (7). And Down The Stretch They Come!

Now to the overall totals, where the 2009 champion earns our lifelong admiration and maybe a custom-designed button.
Currently standing in seventh, someone who five years ago would probably have been to all 91 with Rick and I -- Rob at a measly 11. Man up, Rob.
A slightly higher number in sixth place, our independent creative consultant (who hasn't been earning his title lately), Derek. Derek, you used to be an Idea Man.
Number five on our list, number 4,793 in our hearts, and the provider of much amusement with his oft-misguided bar antics...Adam with 13. Stay gold, Ponyboy.
Missing a podium spot by one place but a handful of bars off pace, the forever imitated, never duplicated, hilariously intoxicated, undefeated and reigning champion of the Chicago Bar Dance Off, the very healthy and disease-free man standing by the bar...Selfy with 14.
Third place, someone who probably would've been the pre-year favorite to take the EBONY 3rd Wheel Championship (and he's still got a good shot at it...), author of our favorite and most nonsensical incoming texts and wall posts (sorry Craig), the Twilight loving Hall with 17.
Current Runner-up, only two away from being the pack leader after five months, the man with 19 bars attended and four first names. By far my favorite single-serving friend. That's very clever. Thank You. How's that working out for you, being clever? Okay, I guess. Well then, keep it right up. Tim/Peter/Leroy/Chuck, keep it right up. Now, just one question remains...

Our leader in the clubhouse? He needs no introduction but he'll get one. You know him, you love him, your favorite and our friend -- Internet Celebrity Baumer! 21 visits to alcohol serving establishments with Rick and I over the last 5 months. Well Met, Baumer.

Thanks for reading this review of numbers that really don't mean anything at all in the grand scheme of things.
If there's a weekend recap after the last 2 days of May we might have a guest author...stay tuned. See you kids on the streets. Bring your friend and his green hat.